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Monday, December 25, 2006

All I want for Christmas is you

Cam I love it okay, I've browsed through it before & all (: Ahhhhh ultimate loveeeeee
Grace I know! My Sister's Keeper is also nice, have you read that? Nah it's okay (: I was wondering why didn't you tag & all, then I thought you might be at your dad's place & all (: Thanks! Didn't really thought that anyone would like it. Merry christmas to you too babes! Love yoooou much!
April Is that book nice? Actually most of her books are fab! Haaha Merry Christmas to you April love (:
Yifang K you're starting to sound like someone I hate to the max. You hardly tag so I thought you don't read at all, haha.
Jyi Which? PS. I Love You? It's fabbbbbbbb :)
Jo Relinked! Merry Christmas sexyyyy :) Oh Friendster! Hahah. You were expecting something else than Friendster's horoscope right, hahaha.
Chesna Merry Christmas to you too babes!
Rena Merry Christmas to you!
Laura Merry Christmassssss (:

Thanks for commenting
(:

Thanks Jace, Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to one & all! :D

Most of you should have received my Christmas cards :) I was rushing for time so I didn't make handmade ones for everyone. I really wanna get everyone the handmade one but I didn't have the time to make for everyone. So the very last minute thing, I got cards & just wrote some greetings & sent them all out. Sorry guys, really sorry! This Vday or CNY okay? I'll try my very best to get everyone a handmade one :) I'm not biased :D

0415pm
I spent the past four hours crying my eyes out, thinking if what I just did was wrong in any way. My eyes hurt now, very badly & I can barely open my eyes. I didn't wanna spend Christmas like this, I didn't wanna make Christmas like this for you. I'm always at fault while you're never, or rather you never admit. When you're serious, I take whatever you said to heart - whether you meant it or not. I ruined your weekend for the past few weeks & I don't wanna make it worse this time. I'll stick around on my own, I'll leave you alone. I make sure I'm away from you unless needed. When you said you didn't want me around, I won't go near. I hate to make you upset, & allow your emotions affect the rest of them. You don't know how it has affected me when you said that to me last week. From then, I've decided if I'm not needed, I won't go near. And if you're gonna break whatever promise you've made, I hate you. And the hatred will stay in me, my whole life.

I'm really tired, very sick & tired of facing this. If we're falling apart, I'll move a step away from you so I can stitch up whatever's tearing. I can't stand crying over & over again everyday for the same ol'reason. I don't want to, I don't have to, I don't need to. I didn't wanna call up the rest to ask how am I suppose to go, when am I suppose to go 'cos I didn't wanna embarrass you, I didn't wanna allow them to speak ill of you. I didn't like that. I want their impression of you to stay as perfect as it is.

Perhaps the appearance of me irks you. Don't worry. I remembered what you said about me moving out. I will okay? Once I've found a place to settle down, I will. And by then, you'll never see me again. Wave hello to Peace there.

Why? Because if I don't, then you're not gonna be happy, none of us is either. So I stepped out. You ought to be happier, isn't it?

Well, I still could even thought a phone call might save my day but no, I was wrong. Ha ha ha I won't think in this way anymore.

I wanan know what's gonna go on for the rest of the day. Whether I'd jump to my death & join the rest up there celebrating the birth of Christ or I'd still come home happily after that fucked up rehearsal to sleep & wake up tmr to get my schoolbooks.

Why should I care? You weren't there when I was scared, when I was so alone.
Avril Lavigne's Losing Grip.

Now, should I still go for the rehearsal?
If I don't go, everything's gonna get fucked up & the person who's losing out ain't gonna be me. Well, later then I'll decide.

The entry starting off good, I'm sorry about the bitter ending.
Merry Christmas.

I'm tired of making love to a memory.
<3.


4:40 PM
Mend this broken thing./
( )